Abuse: Emotional & Verbal

  • Dictate what you do, whom you see, or where you go and when
  • Call you names, put you down, or humiliate you
  • Make you feel ashamed, isolated, wrong, stupid, scared, worthless, or crazy
  • Act jealous, accuse you unfairly of cheating, flirting, or having affairs
  • Threaten you or make you feel afraid
  • Punish you by giving you the silent treatment or withholding affection
  • Constantly criticize you and your children
  • Make you feel like you are “walking on eggshells” all the time
  • Blame you for everything that goes wrong
  • Make it hard for you to stay connected to friends or family
  • Make you feel guilty for spending time with someone else or on interests outside the home or relationship
  • Threaten to take your children from you
  • Throw or break objects, punch walls, kick doors or do other things intended to frighten you
  • Intentionally make you late or unable to get to appointments, meetings or other things in your schedule on a regular basis
  • Continually harass you with texts, calls, e-mails or other types of messaging
  • Demand immediate response to calls/messages regardless of where you are or what you’re doing
  • Destroy or sell your personal property (especially items with great sentimental value)
  • Use your immigration status or personal history against you
  • Insist on accompanying you to medical and other appointments or speak for you when you are asked questions
  • Tell you that they cannot live without you and threaten to harm themselves if you leave
  • Insist that you are nothing without them
  • Tell you that you are lucky to be in the relationship or that no one else will ever want you
  • Threaten to physically harm you, your children, or pets
  • Insist you do all housework and childcare-related tasks
  • Threaten to leave you if their demands are not met and their rules are not followed
  • Encourage your children to act disrespectfully or abusively to you
  • Disrespect or mistreat you in front of children
  • Tell you that you can try to leave but that you will never be able to get away from them
  • Act lovingly and apologetically after verbally or physically harming you in order to keep you hopeful that things are going to get better 
  • Use profanity or other vulgar/upsetting language in a disrespectful or harmful way
  • Lie, break promises, betray trust
  • Play mind games, rewrite history (sometimes called gaslighting) to suit their purposes
  • Make light of or minimize their abusive behavior